oh no, i don noe why my tag board gt problem.. need to ask g help me wid it again haha.. oh well, went for class chalet and was nt too bad... haiz but i wanted it to be happy and fun all the way ,but i guess it did nt turn out tat way after all.. philip did put in a lot of effort for tis and i am glad almost the whole class turned up for it..
first day of the chalet, cant really remember wat happen!! i remeber i gt tipsy and all.. i guess i caused a few ppl to get pissed of and all.. so im really very sry to all..and tat nite, when my pal philip was harsh on his words to be, i don noe why i gt so damn upset over it.. juz feels so embarassing when he toked abt my parents and all in front of my whole class.. but i guess he did tat for my own gd coz i was so stuborn and drank till i exceeded my limits.. i truly deserved it.. i always make wrong decisions in life, also don noe why!! haizz.. anyways i did nt wan to spoil the whole show and all so juz walked in a room juz think why he threw words on me lik tat.. anyways later things turned back to normal.. oh ya aft tat we all went to the maze( some creepy shitty place) frm the start i did nt feel gd walkin to tat place already!! i tried to be humble as i can as i walked there.. when it comes to such things my heart is very weak!! felt so damn scared coz as walkin i could feel so many things juz watching all of us!! however, later when we reached the maze, i knew i shld nt go in by any chance and juz stay out.. and so i did. me and G did nt go at all!! we knew its nt clean and very disrepectful.. so i remain out prayin for the rst who when in to be safe!! haha now when i type all of tis sound so over reacting!! but tis hw i really felt at tat point.. real freaky!!
so aft tat return back to chalet and i when up to a room and wanted to juz lye dwn for a while.. and i juz ended up slpin..
Second day of chalet... everything was fine till the nite when i started drinking again...haizzz i don noe why!!!
so many things i hav to change abt myself... saw things tat i did nt wan to see!! haizz.. felt a bit sad and all, but been really workin hard since that day to get over this and juz forget everything!! plus i had to find out abt much more things... juz wish i did not noe abt it and all!! nw i juz donnoe hw to react.. advising others when i myself nt completely over it and all!! A very shitty feeling within me!! haizz.. nv expect the chalet to turn out lik tis for me!! but still happy for the rest who had a great time!! well, i don wan to analyse tis problem once again coz makes me think more and get more upset!!
and yea, remeber getting breathing problem!! tat made me feel even more un comfortable and all.. at tat point felt lik i was goin to lose myself!! felt lik another attack.. last attack i remeber i gt when i was in sec3, during one of my netball training.. gt heat stroke and a attack!! was rushed to hospital then!! tis time i think it was a bit too much of drinks + cigg + thoughts and feelings!!
but aft awhile i gt better..
OKIE.. i don wan to think too much abt things and get back to square 1.. for nw, will be juz lookin forward to go back to skool and really werk hard for my next sem!!
sem 1 results was nt wat i expected.. i noe i did study, but did nt expect to get so low for my GPA!! tats was another dissapointing news to find out on the day of he chalet!! anyways, wat is done is done.. i don wish to look back!! juz start a new chapter and keep moving on wid life...

why all tis?